Day 132 – Nifty 50 with back button and the value of me.

I struggled today. I was using the Nifty 50 lens and having a go at back button focusing… but it was windy today and I just could not get it to focus properly…. but it was amazing when I looked through the lens to see how much has changed in the last week or so… the leaves have grown more, the bluebells nearly over, the ferns have uncurled. I was not sure whether this one’s aperture was too shallow?

ISO100, F2.5, 1/400 sec
ISO100, F2.5, 1/400 sec

But when I tried a higher aperture I preferred the blurry background in the above shot.

ISO 100, F5.6, 1/80sec
ISO 100, F5.6, 1/80sec

There are still bluebells to be found and with today’s cloudy skies they still look lovely.

ISO100, F5.6, 1/125 sec
ISO100, F5.6, 1/125 sec

I just liked the contrast between the delicate flowers and the dark rough bark.

ISO100, F5.6, 1/100 sec
ISO100, F5.6, 1/100 sec

More Bluebells, this time down by the river.

ISO160, F5.6, 1/80sec
ISO160, F5.6, 1/80sec

The uncurling ferns

ISO500, F5.6, 1/60sec
ISO500, F5.6, 1/60sec

I wrote this and then I read an article that I just have to share:

“I did not go to a formal photography school. In fact, I didn’t even study photography. I studied people and art, but the only true darkroom I have ever been in was when I wandered into my Grandfather’s in the basement once before, being knocked over by the chemical smell and never making that mistake again. I didn’t take pictures for my high school yearbook. I’ve never worked for a college newspaper. I don’t carry my camera with me everywhere (it’s heavy and really gets in the way). All of that said and when someone asks me what I do for a living, I say, “I’m a photographer.”

Your can read more here. I struggle with this… I wish I could learn to value what I do more… I take great photos of people’s Bed and Breakfasts,  I take lovely photos of babies, I want to take more photos of children, I love taking photos of our natural world and I want to make money from photgraphy … but I struggle with the value of my work.

I ran 10k at the weekend … I want to improve but to get a personal trainer to make me exercise is £35 an hour and I gotta do the work … yet people don’t value my photos, won’t pay that for a couple of hours photo shoot (let alone more) that would improve their business.  I lack confidence in saying my pictures can make you feel good or your business look amazing… yet a personal trainer can’t make me faster, fitter and more amazing in an hour…  so what is my value?

Yet … I am a mum to three amazing teens, I have fought to get the best education I can for one of them, I was a guider, then a Beaver Scout Leader, then the district Beaver Leader and ran events for over 250 6-8 year olds, I have always run my own business …. yet if I say I work from home that is not value added…. despite that fact I have continued my learning – got 2 level 4 qualifications both with distinction and in different fields, and am currently involved in running three businesses.

I think this photo blog is helping me to think about the value of me…  I am learning about my likes, dislikes, talents and interests … somedays I feel I am sharing my soul … others I am amazed at just how much I have now learnt about photography …. but I do wish someone would tell me what I am worth.

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2 thoughts on “Day 132 – Nifty 50 with back button and the value of me.

  1. There are no words to say how much you are worth, but to me you are an amazing person to achieve what you have achieved. To brighten each day with fantastic photos I just don’t know how you find the time.

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  2. Don’t say you work from home, say you work from your studio, give it a separate address if you feel you need to. You are a photographer. You are a website designer. You are a graphic designer. Each label describes just one facet of you and who you are. You are an expert in the field of you. You know your capabilities. You know your worth in each area in which you are an expert. It is time to put that photographer brochure together and get pricing your work and your worth. You have enough shots to put a portfolio together.
    If they won’t pay for your time, then they don’t get your time. Unless you choose to give it for a reduced package.

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